Feb 2, 2010

Accept me As i Am

I'm honest. Some call me a Bitch. So what. See the worry in my eye. I'm me. I'm real. I'm not fake and I don't want to be what YOU want me to be. I'm not the norm. I'm crazy. I'm wacky. I'm confident. I'm a Goddess in my own right. Isn't that what everyone woman should be? There are people who think I may be rude at times, probably because my social filter doesn't work so well anymore. I say what I want and I say what I mean. I'm the friend you want to ask 'Does my arse look fat in these jeans?' ... if you want the brutal truth. But believe me, if your arse looks hot in those jeans - you'll know that as well! I can't lie. I have a probl
em with lying in general, so why would I want to lie?

This can't be a bad thing right? This can't be a problem? I hope not. I don't want to change who I am to suit anyone. But sometimes I have to change myself to suit a situation. I just don't understand why. I don't understand why you can't just accept me as I am not take me for granted. Coz that's what people do. We take each other for granted. It's horrible. And then you still have the audacity to ask 'Why?' when something goes wrong or when someone is taken from you. Not that I say it's right or anything. I just want to remind you to enjoy and cherish the people you have in your life. The people you love. They won't be there forever. That's for sure. And you never know when your time is up. You never know when someone else's time is up.

I, for one, want to be remember by how I made people feel. What I meant in their lives. No matter how small. And I want it to be good. Not bad. I don't want to be remembered by my lies, for one thing. I don't want to be remembered for drinking too much or too little. I don't want to be remembered for not having time for anyone or the bad things I did to them.

I want to be remember by the happiness I brought to someone. I want to be remembered by the small words of wisdom I've shared. I want to be remembered by the smiles I bring and share. I want to be remembered as the friend you could come to for everything. At any time. And it's strange... people tend to NOT rely on other people so much. People tend to keep to themselves a lot. Meanwhile, there are people out there, like me, who WANT others to rely on us. Who want others to want us. To need us. Even in a small way. Now... you have to remember that there is a very thin line to be drawn here. Between relying on someone... And USING them. This line has to be recognized by both parties. At all times. And usually it's not.

Wow I can rant and ramble when I want to... At least it makes sense. I hope. HAHA!!

I am me. That's all I want to be.
Don't try to change me. Just accept me.


Andhari said...

Love this! Yes you should be who you are..always. Being nice is good but sugarcoating everything just isn't right.

Maryx said...

So true Andhari! I wonder if I still CAN sugarcoat... LOL I'm hopeless!