Apr 15, 2011

Taking a (much needed) Break

I have a 17 day 'holiday' waiting for me when I walk out these doors in 30 minutes time. And I can hardly wait. I need it. I want to relax. I want to breathe again. I want to just... do nothing. I want to just... do what I want. I want to sleep. I want to go jogging. I want to go driving around. I want to go and explore places close to where I live... it's amazing how much there is to see and do!

I just need a break. And I'm taking it.

life is art.


Thought Question #135

Grietjie.  Bernice.  Rita.  Jean-Marie.  Delmei.  Nico.  Maritz.  Luhandri.  Eunice.  Diederick.  Shannyn.  And that's off the top of my head.

Wow.  I'm so blessed...

What about you?

Thought Question #134

Isn't it the same thing??

Thought Question #133

My Mom.  My Family.  Love.  Comfort.  My bed.  My childhood.  My cat.

What about you?

Apr 13, 2011

Thought Question #132

That I'm strong.

That my family loves me and I love them.

That my friends love me and I love them.

That my cat is awesome =)

That I am a good friend.

Thought Question #131

Oh wow... how have I not changed would be an easier question to answer.  I have changed in so many ways.  I'm not the person I used to be, in so many ways, but in a lot of other ways, I am the same.  Doesn't make sense, huh?  I've been through things, I've learned my lessons, I've come out the other side broken, damaged, changed and better off.  I don't regret the lessons I've learned, it was necessary to become who I am today... which I hope is a good thing.

I am not the clueless teenager I used to be.  I am wiser, more experienced, in so many different areas of life and love, than I used to be.  I have gained, lost and gained weight, again, but that's okay.  Life always has ups and downs, it's horrible to be in the down's but I know I'll get out of it, better than before.

I have changed.  I have changed a lot.  And I'm glad.  And it's okay.

What about you??

Funny Stuff!

Apr 5, 2011

This too shall pass... right?

Some asswipe broke into my house last week.  Given, they must have been a very small asswipe, as the space they got through to break in through my bedroom window is so tiny, it should actually be a kid.  A really small kid.  But nonetheless... they stole my laptop, the cable of the laptop, my digital camera, it's carry bag and the memory card inside the camera, too.  The left my laptop bag, internet connection card, mouse and cooling pad.  Nice. But, thank goodness for small miracles, I have insurance.

I'm just a bit sad about everything I lost that was on the laptop, because as Murphy would have it, I don't have back up.  But... I'm trying to look on the bright side now.  I get to buy a brand new and better laptop, I get to start all over with my photo's and my memories (those that aren't stored on FB), I get to start over with my pictures (I had just over 20Gig), I get to start over with my writing and such.  And it's okay.  I'm looking forward to it.  I lost a lot of history in the process, my writing, a ton of old poetry and such, but I guess that just gives me a chance to forget about the past, that got captured in those words, and look forward to the future.

I feel like I want to cry and scream and throw things because I'm not able to go on the holiday that I've been looking forward to for ages.  I wanted to go and visit a friend of mine who lives by the coast, and spend some time with her and her family, spend some time on the beach and driving around and sightseeing.  Now, I don't have the money for it anymore, because of circumstances and things that happened.  I've decided I'm still taking my leave from work though, and I'll just spend it relaxing and doing things in the area I live in.  I have 17 days without work!  Can't wait!

After probably one of our biggest fights yet this past weekend, it feels as if Gerhard and I are in limbo.  Either that or I am losing my mind for good this time.  I can hardly explain the way I feel.  It's like I'm numb.

I am extremely frustrated at work.  I am extremely frustrated with my finances.  I am extremely frustrated with never having enough time or money for the things and people I love.  I am extremely frustrated with myself and how tired I constantly am.  I am extremely frustrated with my car situation.

I know this will all go away sooner than I think, but of course it all has been spoiling my week and getting me in a really bad mood in general.  I'm trying to avoid people because of it, but at the same time I can't.  I have to work.  I see my friends.  And I'm trying to arrange a surprise birthday party for a friend who genuinely has it worse off than I do.  Just to make her feel better.  I hope it works out...

What are your frustrations this week?

Apr 4, 2011


This is how I tend to think about the bad in my life.  I try my hardest to keep by it too.  I build a bridge and get over it, even if I do it to bluff myself, it still works!  I wish more people could do this... for their sakes.


I know I'm late on this and not the only one but... WTF is up with this girl?!

Thought Question #130

I don't know...


Beautiful Gothic Style Dolls (I definitely know someone who would adore these!)