Aug 11, 2009

Single Girl in a Single World


Why is it that something that is the best for both parties... hurts so much?
Why is it that even though there was so much fighting and so much hurt during the relationship... I still love him?
Why is it that I can't look at him without falling hopelessly in love with him all over again?
Why is this so hard and so necessary at the same time?
Why can't we fix it just one more time?

I'm single. I said it.
We spoke about it. No yelling. No fighting. No alcohol. Just him and I. For the last time. Together for a second more. Oh don't worry I'll get over it. I always do. The thing is, we share mutual friends. Well, my friends. So we're gonna have to see each other. A lot. How will that go ya think? We made a promise that we wouldn't come to any get-togethers with someone else. At least for a while. Is that good or bad?

Okay I'm a bit out of words now. Think I'll just go to bed with my cat and my tears. It'll be better tomorrow. I hope.

8 comments:

Simon Butler said...

Sorry to hear of your sadness, but from what you’ve written previously making a split does seem to be the best thing to do.

As for the promises of not being seen with Someone Else, I suspect that will not may not last terribly long; it would seem unrealistic to expect it to. But you know him and yourself best.

Good luck anyway.

Maryx said...

Thanx Simon. I do think we respect each other enough to hold it off for a while. But what happens happens. Life goes on right?

Mr. Condescending said...

I think simon said it perfectly.

mega, single can be really fun though.

Maryx said...

I guess so Mr C.
Thing Is... I haven't been single for years. Literally. It's VERY scary.

Andhari said...

I think you really took it well, this sounds so mature. I know it must be really sad in the inside but I'm glad you hold it together. I hope it's for the best and you can focus on yourself and your happiness now :)

Maryx said...

Thanx Andhari. I do try.
Feeling tons better already. The world is my oyster right?! =)

The Demigoddess said...

I thought you guys would never separate..I mean, I think you might have separated and gotten back together before. Isn't this one of those times when you just need space and after a short time, you throw yourself in his arms and you're back again?

I hope you're okay, babe.

Maryx said...

Thanx Girl. I'm getting over it slowly but surely. I'm strong that way. Didn't think I'd be though. Friends like you help a lot. I don't think we're gonna get back together though. This was sober and final. It's for the best.

I'll still be seeing him though. Maybe we'll turn out to like each other all over again. But I'm NOT getting my hopes up.

Thanx so much for popping in.