Apr 5, 2011

This too shall pass... right?


Some asswipe broke into my house last week.  Given, they must have been a very small asswipe, as the space they got through to break in through my bedroom window is so tiny, it should actually be a kid.  A really small kid.  But nonetheless... they stole my laptop, the cable of the laptop, my digital camera, it's carry bag and the memory card inside the camera, too.  The left my laptop bag, internet connection card, mouse and cooling pad.  Nice. But, thank goodness for small miracles, I have insurance.

I'm just a bit sad about everything I lost that was on the laptop, because as Murphy would have it, I don't have back up.  But... I'm trying to look on the bright side now.  I get to buy a brand new and better laptop, I get to start all over with my photo's and my memories (those that aren't stored on FB), I get to start over with my pictures (I had just over 20Gig), I get to start over with my writing and such.  And it's okay.  I'm looking forward to it.  I lost a lot of history in the process, my writing, a ton of old poetry and such, but I guess that just gives me a chance to forget about the past, that got captured in those words, and look forward to the future.

I feel like I want to cry and scream and throw things because I'm not able to go on the holiday that I've been looking forward to for ages.  I wanted to go and visit a friend of mine who lives by the coast, and spend some time with her and her family, spend some time on the beach and driving around and sightseeing.  Now, I don't have the money for it anymore, because of circumstances and things that happened.  I've decided I'm still taking my leave from work though, and I'll just spend it relaxing and doing things in the area I live in.  I have 17 days without work!  Can't wait!

After probably one of our biggest fights yet this past weekend, it feels as if Gerhard and I are in limbo.  Either that or I am losing my mind for good this time.  I can hardly explain the way I feel.  It's like I'm numb.

I am extremely frustrated at work.  I am extremely frustrated with my finances.  I am extremely frustrated with never having enough time or money for the things and people I love.  I am extremely frustrated with myself and how tired I constantly am.  I am extremely frustrated with my car situation.

I know this will all go away sooner than I think, but of course it all has been spoiling my week and getting me in a really bad mood in general.  I'm trying to avoid people because of it, but at the same time I can't.  I have to work.  I see my friends.  And I'm trying to arrange a surprise birthday party for a friend who genuinely has it worse off than I do.  Just to make her feel better.  I hope it works out...

What are your frustrations this week?

4 comments:

Vinita Santhosh said...

This too shall surely pass my dear.... this too shall pass... just be strong enough!

Prashanth said...

Sad time has to pass... they say nothin is constant except change... and this time shall pass...
as u tried to do, look at the good aspects... be a reason for a smile for your friend... make her feel special on her bday... nd u will feel better...
btw.. new reader... vil giv intro wen u r in a happy mood.. :-)

Maryx said...

=)

(Welcome new reader!)

michael said...

All things pass in time. Situations. Thoughts. Things. People. Everything real must go away, one day.

Everything's alright. I hope you know you are, too. Because, so very few things matter. But you do.